
Come on in. The Terrell Owens Show is about to begin. Walk right through that blue curtain and head to the back of the Dallas Cowboys locker room. Then squeeze into the semicircle of humanity around his cubicle.
For 13 years, Owens has been an NFL spectacle, yet he just blends into the madness here. His mouth and his antics overshadow the fact that T.O. is one of the best playmakers of all-time, ranking second in career touchdown receptions (136) and seventh in receiving yards (13,788).
In Seattle, we hear about this guy all the time. He's either popping off or showing off, pouting or clowning, annoying someone or everyone. He's comical or crazy or both.
Six years ago when he played for the 49ers, Owens made the Seahawks the butt of one of his jokes. After scoring in a "Monday Night Football" game at Qwest Field, Owens pulled a Sharpie from his sock, signed the ball and gave it to his financial adviser in the stands.
But that's in the past, along with the snipes at Jeff Garcia and Donovan McNabb. With Owens, there's always new material.
Last Thursday and Sunday in a two-part interview with Deion Sanders on the NFL Network, Owens complained about his lack of productivity, more or less blaming it on offensive coordinator Jason Garrett.
"The thing is, if Garrett is smart enough to know what made me successful all those years, he'll go back and look at San Francisco and Philly," Owens told Sanders. "The difference is, I was a priority."
Naturally, Owens backed it up with a seven-catch, 213-yard performance in a 35-22 victory over the 49ers, the second-most prolific effort of his career.
Mike Holmgren noticed.
"He's absolutely a concern for us," said the Seahawks coach, whose team plays Owens and the Cowboys on Thanksgiving Day. "If you don't have a game plan for him ... then he can almost by himself win the Football game. To me, he looks like the same player he's always been."
Owens will turn 35 on Dec. 7, and the whispers have started. Until Sunday's dazzler, he had five consecutive games of fewer than 40 receiving yards.
After the 49ers game, Dallas Morning News columnist Jean-Jacques Taylor praised him but also wrote that Owens doesn't run as well as he used to, struggles against bump-and-run coverage and drops too many passes.
He still looks terrific. I know this because I bought his recently released book, "T.O's Finding Fitness: Making the Mind, Body and Spirit Connection for Total Health." On the cover, he's beyond buff.
In the book, he details his diet and workout regimen while demonstrating different weight-lifting exercises that can benefit everyone.
"Fitness starts with the mind," Owens writes. "Once you believe that you can lose weight, the 'how-to' part will come more easily."
During the season, the self-proclaimed bachelor eats the same breakfast every morning - eight to 10 egg whites and a bowl of oatmeal - and frequently has sea bass or salmon for dinner.
In the offseason he'll give in to junk-food pleasures in moderation - his favorites are M&Ms, Kit-Kats, Doritos and Ruffles. He also will have two drinks a week - a white wine and an apple Martini.
"You must be disciplined about your diet," Owens writes. "(But) discipline does not mean denial."
"T.O's Finding Fitness" is on the top shelf of his locker as "The Terrell Owens Show" gets under way with a surprisingly subdued host. He is wearing blue sweats and a blue T-shirt that says "iLove" on the front and "me some me" on the back. When you've got a minute, please explain "iLove me some me" to me.
The look on Owens' face screams: "How many times have I been through this dog-and-pony show before?"
I know the look; the same one's on my face.
"Terrell, do you look at the wild-card standings," someone asks.
"Nope," he says.
"(Linebacker) Greg Ellis said he likes the smell of this team. Do you agree with that?"
"I guess," T.O. says.
"Did you ever think you'd see the day when the Seahawks were 2-9?"
"I don't think about the Seahawks," he says.
Owens is peppered with questions about the NFL Network interview. Does he think Garrett was offended by his comments?
"I don't know, you'll have to ask him," Owens says. "He hasn't said anything to me."
No one can believe that he was dissatisfied with his 213-yard game and didn't watch "SportsCenter." Why not, T.O.?
" 'Cause I could've been doing it all year long," he says. "I didn't feel pressure by the interview I did. I know what I can do.
"I didn't watch no highlights. It ain't nothin' I haven't done before. I'm still not satisfied, still not. For what? It's not anything new. I've seen myself on highlights plenty of times."
He didn't read it, but someone told him about Taylor's column in the Morning News.
"According to (Taylor), I was done, washed up," Owens says. "I got jammed (with) San Francisco and Philly. Being 34 (years old), y'all say I can't get off a jam. I'm 34 but I just had (213) yards. Now what? Talk about that."
I was preparing to interject with my usual assortment of inane questions when a bubbly radio reporter asked him if he could say "Happy Thanksgiving" for a promotional spot. Owens declined.
After that, a "say, T.O., have you got a dog?" question didn't seem like something he'd entertain. Besides, I think he's got a cat, or so it would seem - he's pictured meditating next to a Siamese in his book.
"The Terrell Owens Show" is almost over. Our host is heading toward the exit with grovelers in his wake, searching for one more morsel of T.O wisdom.
"So what would satisfy you? A ring?" he's asked.
"Yeah," Owens replies. "When we win the Super Bowl."
P-I columnist Jim Moore can be reached at 206-448-8013 or jimmoore@seattlepi.com
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